Having trouble deciphering the language in Backpages? Here's a little help:
"flowers" -- money. don't bring real flowers
"professional massage" -- quick rub improvised on the spot
"9 inches" -- 6 inches
"26 years old" -- over 40
"classy" -- whore
"non-negotiable" -- negotiable
"Top and bottom" -- one or the other
"Love to kiss" -- will kiss you reluctantly
"Sabrina Suzuki" -- NOT Sabrina Suzuki
"Mariana Cordoba" -- NOT Mariana Cordoba
"My pics are real" -- pics are 17 years old
"I am selective" -- money talks
"Fully functional" -- sometimes functional
"No rush" -- 20 minutes
"with big surprise" -- You just told us! Where's the surprise?
"Submissive" -- total bitch
"college student" -- has driven past a college at least once
"VIP" -- 10 extra minutes
"First timers welcome" -- knows how to play a sucker
"gym body" -- not obese